Rough Week

It has been a rough week. I work for the American Cancer Society and I absolutely love my job. I get to train and recruit volunteers to work in our Cancer Resource Centers as well as run two programs that are beneficial and helpful to cancer patients. Most days I understand that cancer is just a part of the job and I am not saying I am desensitized but I know it comes with the territory. But this past week has been hard. I found out a friend from college was diagnosed with leukemia, a co-workers mother was diagnosed with glioblastoma, another co-workers mother has brain cancer. I have been thinking alot lately about how short life is and how quickly it can change. I am almost 4 months pregnant and I cant imagine not being here for my child. And the thought of Aaron getting cancer terrifies me. I know these are times I have to trust in the Lord and know that his plans are greater than my own. But its really hard. I don't want to miss anything. I have a hemangioma, a benign tumor in my brain. I have had it since childbirth but did not know about it until 2007. I have to go in on March 16th to meet with a neurosurgeon to discuss this and my birthing options. They can rupture during labor. So I am going to discuss the options. I will probably have to have another MRI as well. I am just scared that they might find something else or scratch the whole thing and just tell me I have brain cancer. I know it may sound silly but I am worry wart and when I have free time to think my brain automatically wanders to these things. I just feel like I have so much to live for and I don't want to miss anything. I know this is a depressing post but its how I feel right now. And being away from my family and friends in Oklahoma is really hard in times like these.